Laughter...

A friend from High School just found me on Facebook. She posted on my wall and asked me if I still laughed as much as I used to. She said she could almost still hear me laughing. Wow. I had to think for a minute before I replied. I think I used to laugh a lot more than I do now. I guess my laughter is just different. In High School the only responsibility I had was to myself---make sure I got good grades, make sure I had my college applications in, make sure I was doing everything I needed to do to succeed in life. That was it. Just me. Life is different now. I have a lot of people counting on me for food, comfort, and everything else to help them succeed in life. Laughter just isn't an all day, every day event anymore. Every once in awhile when I go out with the girls that laughter just swells up inside me and I can't contain it. Like when I was in New York with my Mom and Katelyn. I was laughing so hard at one point I literally almost peed my pants. I still have my "2 o'clock in the morning" laugh that too many people have witnessed. It's uncontrollable. It happened to show itself one time around Kennedy and she was afraid I'd lost it. She almost seemed scared as she watched the tears stream down my face because of it. After I was able to catch my breath between laughing outbursts I assured her all would be fine. My laughter has definitely changed. I used to think shows where kids make ginormous messes were funny. Like the scene in Cheaper By The Dozen when the frog gets loose at the kitchen table. I don't laugh at those things anymore. I live those things. Trust me, they aren't funny in the moment. I do laugh at my kids though. Like when Landon always says "actually". What 2 year old says "actually" in the right context? My kids are always saying something worth a good chuckle. But the good, hard, belly laughs aren't as frequent as they were in high school. They still show up every now and again, but I don't think that people that know me now will remember me for my laughter. I'm okay with that. But, I do want to laugh more. So, thanks Cindy for the reminder of how much I used to laugh. Laughter is one thing everyone could use a little more of. Especially me.