Little Me...

Jackson has been a little troublesome as of late. He missed me. And he misses his dad. When we got back late Wednesday night he was in bed. Shawn was on call Thursday and then left for a long work week. He was on call yesterday too, which meant Jack really hasn't seen him for over a week. I can tell a noticeable difference in behavior when Shawn hasn't been around. Last night Shawn was baby-sitting an epidural and had a free hour before his next surgery so the kids and I took him dinner. When it was time to leave Jack didn't want to go, of course. Shawn, being the loving man that he is, suggested I leave Jack with him. He said he would set him up in the OR lounge watching TV. I was hesitant at first, but the thought of only having to put the easy kids to bed made me quickly depart before minds were changed. We had a lovely evening at home. I told Landon to get his sippy cup of water and climb into bed. I went looking for him 10 minutes later and he had tucked himself in with a book. Nice. A 3 year old that tucks himself in. After all 4 kids were asleep I started to worry about Jack. It was 9:30 and I hadn't heard anything. I paged Shawn and he said they were headed home. When they walked in Jack had a grin the size of Texas on his face. He was also wearing a surgical cap. He ran to grab the picture he drew. I was a little confused. Shawn said that as he was setting him up in the lounge the surgeon walked in and said "Oh, we got a little guy with us tonight?" He was then given the okay to suit him up. Jack donned the doctor garb and sat next to Shawn throughout the surgery. He even drew a picture of what he saw. (I'll add it when I can load it on the computer.) Shawn said he was very appropriately behaved for a surgery setting. Wide eyed and entranced by the whole procedure. He was especially fascinated with the blood. Anyone that knows Jack knows that he loves the body and anything "skeleton". He's always said he would be an orthopedic surgeon one day because then he can do surgery and use tools at the same time. Insightful. Looks like he's a boy after his dad's heart. Only, dad anesthetizes the patient instead of operating. I'm so happy that Jack got to spend this time with Shawn. It was good for both of them. One of the docs took this picture with her phone:

Jack woke up and said "When me & Dad go to surgery tonight..." It's going to be rough explaining that that was a once in a lifetime experience. At least until he's old enough to go to Medical School himself.

* The yellow on the left is Shawn, the right yellow is both the patient and surgeon. The red on the right is blood coming from the patient sucked into the tube leading into the suction canister full of blood on the left. The blue is the bone clamp the surgeon used. Apparently he got really close up to this surgery to draw that kind of detail.

Punishment...

Whenever I leave my kids for an extended period of time, I always expect to be punished when I return. Usually in the form of bad behavior. But, I returned just after midnight on Wednesday and Thursday the day was smooth. Friday was even fabulous. I thought I was out of the water on this one. Until today. They were waiting until I felt comfortable enough to let my guard down to dish out the punishment. Jack is the main punisher. Kennedy has shed a few tears, and Landon has been kind of a bully, but Jack is the reason my shoulders are tight and my head hurts from frustration. 7 time-outs. In a 2 hour time span. I finally left him in his room for 1 hour with instructions to fix everything he destroyed in the first 10 minutes he was left alone. We forgave each other our trespasses, cuddled a little, and left it that we would get along the rest of the day. Until 5 minutes later he went back on his promise and had Landon in tears as well as the neighbor boy. Am I just never supposed to leave so I am never punished? It would probably help if Shawn were home to take some of Jack's actions, but no. It's just me left to deal with him. Lovely.
Pictures have been scant as of late. We got a new computer and don't have the software loaded to enable me getting them off the camera. And when the laptop crashed we lost everything we haven't taken time to back up yet. Including everything since Presley's birth. Sad day. Good thing it's the 5th child and we can use that as our excuse.
Landon just came in crying due to Jack something or other. Looks like it's finally time for bed.
When Shawn returns and I can safely sit here for sometime I'll dish about our trip to Washington.

Grateful....

We are officially in the market for a job. Man it feels good to be able to say that. After 13 years of marriage it's finally time for Shawn to become fully employed and no longer accountable to any professor or training physician. He'll be in a group where he will be equal to the others in that group (after he proves himself for awhile and shows them his stuff I'm sure). Nice. We've been discussing for the past 3 years where we'd like to live when we finally grow up. Idaho and Utah were kind of given due to the close proximity of family. However, jobs around those parts are scarce. Unless he does a fellowship, which at this time sounds painful to me. One more year of training. Blech. If he truly wanted to do a fellowship I would support his desire, but I can tell he's antsy to not be once again under someones tutelage. So, there are 48 other states to choose from. I told Shawn I was open to anything. With a few exceptions. If I can't live close to family then I need to live close to an airport. I would also like to have a few options as far as shopping goes. Walmart is great, if you choose to go there. I would just like a few more choices. After turning down about 30 places he mentioned where good paying jobs were open, he told me to start looking. I found myself looking only in Washington State. I've always loved it there. I lived there for 8 of my growing up years. Bothell and Moses Lake. Loved them both for different reasons. It wasn't until I started thinking about the possibility of settling there that I kind of got excited. Shawn contacted a few recruiters and set up an interview in Richland, which is part of the Tri-Cities. I used to go to the mall there when I was in High School, so I've been there before. He's also in contact with various recruiters throughout the entire state. A few in Central Wa, and some in SW Wa. I'm so excited at the prospect of going back there. That is, if we even end up in that state. Anything is possible at this point. The truly crazy thing? Katherine and Bobby agreed to come watch 4 of our 5 kids for a few days so I can travel with Shawn to Richland. They are so awesome to do this for us. I'm so grateful to have a friend like Katherine. Let's just hope she is still my friend when we return....

Going Solo....

Friday the kids were out of school due to parent teacher conferences. I decided instead of sitting around all day we'd head to Columbia to go to Bonkers. It's 1 1/2 hours away. I guess I've adjusted to this whole new baby in the house thing because the thought of traveling that far with 5 kids didn't seem to phase me. We met some friends in Bonkers and played for awhile. The kids got hungry and we decided to leave for lunch. My kids are obviously children of a resident because when I asked where we should eat the response was "Sam's Club!" It was unanimous. Funny. Can't beat 3 pieces of pizza, 3 pretzels, one hot dog, and 2 drinks all for 11 bucks. My kids are awesome. We picked up a new computer in Sam's. Our old one is doing all kinds of funky things since we started letting our kids use it. This one is for mom & dad only. The box was ginormous and could only go in the front seat because we are officially full to capacity now. Shawn called while we were in Sam's to let me know he locked his keys in his car. His other set was with me in the van. That was 1:45. I checked out, drove to the mall, went to Target, then to the play place to feed Presley, changed 2 diapers, 3 kids went to the bathroom, and we headed back for home all by 3:30. Pretty impressive if you ask me. The computer up front made for an interesting drive. Every time I would turn a corner it would fall into me risking an accident. I used my right elbow to hold it up. Man, my biceps hurt by the time we pulled into the driveway. Shawn grabbed his keys and headed off for a long work weekend. Hopefully we'll see him tomorrow night sometime as he is on call here tomorrow. I now feel like Presley is just another part of the crew. It helps that she is sleeping better so I'm functioning at a more normal level. I'm sure glad we all figured this out because I'll be going solo for another 8 months. Then this phase of the journey will end and hopefully we'll see more of the man I love.

Laughter...

A friend from High School just found me on Facebook. She posted on my wall and asked me if I still laughed as much as I used to. She said she could almost still hear me laughing. Wow. I had to think for a minute before I replied. I think I used to laugh a lot more than I do now. I guess my laughter is just different. In High School the only responsibility I had was to myself---make sure I got good grades, make sure I had my college applications in, make sure I was doing everything I needed to do to succeed in life. That was it. Just me. Life is different now. I have a lot of people counting on me for food, comfort, and everything else to help them succeed in life. Laughter just isn't an all day, every day event anymore. Every once in awhile when I go out with the girls that laughter just swells up inside me and I can't contain it. Like when I was in New York with my Mom and Katelyn. I was laughing so hard at one point I literally almost peed my pants. I still have my "2 o'clock in the morning" laugh that too many people have witnessed. It's uncontrollable. It happened to show itself one time around Kennedy and she was afraid I'd lost it. She almost seemed scared as she watched the tears stream down my face because of it. After I was able to catch my breath between laughing outbursts I assured her all would be fine. My laughter has definitely changed. I used to think shows where kids make ginormous messes were funny. Like the scene in Cheaper By The Dozen when the frog gets loose at the kitchen table. I don't laugh at those things anymore. I live those things. Trust me, they aren't funny in the moment. I do laugh at my kids though. Like when Landon always says "actually". What 2 year old says "actually" in the right context? My kids are always saying something worth a good chuckle. But the good, hard, belly laughs aren't as frequent as they were in high school. They still show up every now and again, but I don't think that people that know me now will remember me for my laughter. I'm okay with that. But, I do want to laugh more. So, thanks Cindy for the reminder of how much I used to laugh. Laughter is one thing everyone could use a little more of. Especially me.

The Other Mother...

Kennedy is so fun with the little boys when she wants to be. Last Sunday morning she came and asked if her and the boys could have a tea party. You want to entertain the boys? Who am I to say no. I heard a lot of commotion and when I went into the dining area to see what they were
doing, this is what I found:

She had cut up string cheese, hot dogs, and Doritos and placed them all in serving bowls. For dessert they had marshmallows and yogurt. I went back in my room to feed Presley. I heard them doing the dishes. Then Kennedy said, "It's arts and crafts time." I documented this occasion with a picture.

Awesome. Then yesterday after school her and Jack came into my room with a notepad saying they were solving a mystery. They were both wearing detective badges. They had this scenario all worked out about a car found in a lake and they were gathering clues to solve the mystery. I later told Kennedy how much Jack idolized her and how he lights up when she lets him play her games. Who needs me when you have a Kennedy in your life?

Baby Love...

I don't think I've ever seen little boys that love their little sister as much as Jack and Landon love Presley. Sometimes it's adorable to me. Other times it's a little much. Landon won't keep his hands off of her. He's always saying "Can I touch her?" and regardless of my response he rubs her head and kisses her forehead. The other day Presley was crying and I heard Landon saying to her "Landon's here, don't worry, Landon's here". (That's probably why she was crying.) When I entered the room he started to say "Now Momma's here. Now Momma's here Presley. Don't worry". He says everything in a sing-songy voice that is typically used with babies. He's a natural. Jack is the one that has surprised me the most. He is ULTRA gentle with her. He'll be on one end of the house karate chopping anything in his vicinity, then run over and as soft as can be lay next to Presley and stroke her cheek. Amazing the change that overcomes him when he's near her. If you ever want to come see Presley, this is probably what you will get with her: